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At last, a game that caters for my maternal instincts. You watch while the massed infants of the maternity ward crawl around, swallowing enough tranquilisers to keep themselves quiet for a very long time, discovering gravity with the help of the lift shaft and sticking their fingers in sockets for some juice - and I don't mean Ribena!

What? Oh, sorry. Apparently you have to stop them doing all these things. Bo-ring! I'd prefer Saturday night in casualty to keeping the crawling horrors at bay. It calls lot a lot of running around between three floors if you're to dump them all in their cribs. At least you're armed with stun gas to handle persistent offenders.

There's only one thing that stops this satisfyingly sick game being addictive though. There's far too little variety. The first time I played I clocked up such a high score that I feared I'd never see my last life. And when I did, whadja know? No table for the heroines who run into hundreds of thousands. Nursing is so-o-o-o unrewarding?

A pity, because the graphics are gruesomely great as the little dears give up the ghost and there's a triffic sequence whenever you get a new nurse too. But even dedicated Flo Nightingales aren't likely to stick with this one for long. Pass the bedpan, Alice.