Having managed to steal your report during the last few skooldaze of term, you've spent the whole holiday forging teachers' signatures and handwriting to make yourself look like the brightest, sweetest natured, most helpful little soul ever to carry a satchel.
Now all you've got to do is get it back into the Head's safe...
A couple of years ago, your elder brother had exactly the same problem and has lent you his old copy of the School Rules, on which he's scribbled some notes in invisible ink. Holding the paper over a bonfire made from the swot's cap, you can just make out the following:
Key to safe round nek of gurls hedmistris. She hates frogs.
Put frog in cup in gurls kitchin so you can nock it down onto her hed.
Remmember the bike.
Frogs ar kept in laked siense lab star room. Combernasion letters held by masters - get them drunk
Sherry in hedmistris's cubord - only unloked wen sheez shure all the boys ar back in skoal.
Fill water pistle by jumping up to botel. Put sherry in skoal cups and use catapult to nock cups onto masters.
Stink boms - Hed will open window if you drop one wen heez near.
Cairtaker - if you nock him out with a conker by firing catapult from top window of skoal, yool be able to get passed him.
Bike - chaned to conker tree - 4 number combernasion has to be ritten on blackbord to relees it. Each master nose 1 number - sake them with water by nocking water-filled cups with catapult wilst they ar under.
Water pistle and stink boms - hidden in desks. Remmember there ar desks in the gurls skoal too.
Water makes flours grow.
Catching mice is fun. Letting them go in the gurls skoal is even funier.
If you get lots of lines to do, try being ekstra nice to your gurlfrend!
Only the Hed can open the study dare - yool have to jump up to reech the safe.
O - Left, P - Right, Q - Up, A - Down
F - Fire catapult (Fire on joystick), C - Catch Mouse/Frog, J/L - Jump/Leap
D/U - Drop Stink Bomb (if carried), G - Shoot Water Pistol, H - Hit
M - Mount bicycle, R - Release mouse (only works in girls' school)
S - Sit/stand, T - Throw away water pistol, W - Write
Use the direction keys in combination with CAPS SHIFT to move faster.
To pedal bike, use the O and P keys, or waggle the joystick. Q (up) lets you stand on the saddle; A (down) lets you get off the bike. You can jump up whilst standing on the saddle.
Press 'O' when sitting at a desk to open it and find out what, if anything, is inside.
'W' lets you start writing on the blackboard. When you finish, press ENTER.
The program is set up to use the keyboard and suggested names for the characters have been included. You are given the opportunity to select one of several types of joystick, and to alter the names immediately after the game has loaded. If you want to make changes, you should press any letter key whilst the 10 second countdown is going on.
Note: Unplug your computer and reconnect it, to clear it completely before loading.
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