Amstrad Computer User

Yie-Ar Kung Fu
By Imagine
Amstrad CPC464

Published in Amstrad Computer User #15

Yie-Ar Kung-Fu

Another one for all you Bruce Lee fanatics out there. Play it in between karate-chopping breeze-blocks in half, or drop kicking bowls of solidified custard. You played by a character with the unlikely name of Oolong kick, punch and generally inflict grievous bodily harm on a variety of foes who ain't much more civilised. The cast in order of appearance are:

  1. Some great lardball called Buchu who is able to fly through the air with the greatest of ease, thereby giving you a wonderful target if you hand him a flying kick in his guts. He is unarmed, but the next one isn't.
  2. The next one is a she; called Star. Her forte is lobbing shuriken at you and kicking you in the head. For the uninitiated, a shuriken is the cack-handed knife-throwers throwing knife; a lot like a sharpened sheriffs badge.
  3. Seen a nunchak before? Can you pronounce it? Do you care? Well, the next opponent has one and he's bloomin' good with it. Whap, chop, crunch, game over. Exprenation of Oliental terms: a nunchack is like two truncheons handcuffed together at the end. Some versions have three sections, this one has two to keep the graphics easy. Originally used for flailing rice and capitalist swine.
  4. After this little lot, you get to face someone with a BO. This has nothing to do with underarms and is in fact the Japanese version of a quarterstaff. Even if the Japanese are short-staffed, it hurts if someone belts you on the noggin with it.
  5. O.K. Now for some real lo-tech stuff. The fifth opponent is armed with nothing more complicated than a good, old-fashioned club. Eat your heart out Buck Rogers. I just love all this barbarism! Yes, it had to be there. Beware the Samurai! Just like Shogun. Heeeya! One moment while I mop the cup of tea off the tabletop. Yes, the old Samurai with his diasho (that's a sword to you, noodle) is out to convert the innocent into sliced salami; chop-chop. A charming fellow. I wish I had a daughter so's I could forbid him to marry her.
  6. The penultimate goon is armed with tonfa. These are a bigger version of the nunchak and, obviously, hurt more. They also reach further than you would like, so manoeuvres requiring the lowering of the head and protection of the butt are essential. Sounds a bit like a job at Amstrad!
  7. Then there is the grand master, he does all that you can do and better. If I ever catch hold of him, you will hear of it. The report will be preceded by one of a flying pig over Enfield. I don't know what his speciality is but it will probably take me a long time to find out. What can poor little innocent you do to avoid being converted to minced poor little innocent you? The preferred method is to run like hell, Unfortunately this results in you getting caught in the corner and having your living daylights beaten out.

Necessity (or a glance at the instructions) reveals that pushing up on the joystick (or whatever key you defined) causes you to leap up and over in the relevant direction. This puts the opponent off guard. Doing logical things like pushing the fire button causes much violence to be inflicted; usually at air but occasionally on the foe. All you have to do is get your timing right and remember which one of the ten possible offensive strikes matches up with which particular bend of the joystick.

The strange thing with this particular brand of punch-up game is that it sorts out which way you are facing, thus leaving you free to decide how and where to land the foe a fourpenny one. Fourpenny ones are landed with the relevant sound effect; a whoosh if you miss and a hearty whack if you get him in the etceteras. To make it easier to judge if you are hitting or not, the site of impact is marked by a red flash. Hits on you form a black mark (not permanent in either case).

Yie-Ar Kung Fu

The characters are formed in a colourful (if a bit too cartoony fashion. The outline is enhanced a bit by a black border round all the characters.

The background comes in two flavours: Mountain or Temple, both equally well done. The foes pay little attention to the Gods and fight equally well in the temple or on the mountain, The Gods either are not watching or are staying out of the way.

I prefer this one to Way Of The Exploding Fist but would have dearly loved the option of having the second player control the foe instead of taking turns at the same game. The only black mark on it is the speedloader, which will cause loading problems with 664's and 6128's. This though, is a game which is worth cracking the loader for!