Heathrow resembles a full-blown simulation, and, lo, it was indeed written by a real Heathrow Air Traffic Controller, one Mike Male, a name I had a hard time believing, but there's a photo of the man on the cover, so there you go. In fact, like much other stall these days, it's a conversion from an earlier (BBC) version.

If you work your way through the instructions, you'll find yourself 'playing' through a course of exercises designed to give you the ability to direct masses of airliners safely onto the Heathrow tarmac. Don't ask me what you subsequently do with your new skill. By the looks of it, I wouldn't recommend becoming an air traffic controller. Well, not unless you get a kick out of ulcers.

But, of course, irresponsible people like me would just attempt to create mid-air collisions out of boredom.