Big K


Galactic Patrol
By Warlock
BBC Model B

 
Published in Big K #12

Galactic Patrol

Sluggish shoot-'em-up for somnambulistic Space Cadets. Once again Neasden (stop me if you've heard this one before) cowers beneath the boot of an invading alien horde. Screaming Saucers strafe the scrambling populace and swarms of gaily-painted Bubble Craft raze off-world Transporters.

As one of the besieged Fleet Commanders, you'll need the latest in heavy-duty, mega-precise weaponry to repel these unearthly bounders. Unfortunately, in this particular Galactic Patrol there's no such gear. Your Photonic lance is far too polite to do any serious damage and deep-space tracking is next to impossible with cross-hairs that do little more than creep across the screen.

Alien domination seems a racing cert. There are five sheets per round (ground attack/space battle/pit-stop/evasion) and naturally the alien swine grow steadily more confident with each wave. Only the awful key response remains consistent.

Of course, if this were a budget release it might still cut some ice, but when compared to other full-price blastaramas like Zalaga (from Aardvark) it pales into insignificance. Potential Space Cadets must therefore be advised to approach with extreme caution.