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War is not a very nice thing, readers. As unpleasant things go, it's probably second only to Jeremy Beadle. And, just like Jeremy Beadle, war should not be encouraged. We should all be nice to each other, not harbour any violent thoughts, wear flowers in our hair, hold hands and skip merrily through the countryside, sharing jokes with rabbits and fluffy moo cows. [Oh God, he's finally cracked! - Ed]

If, on the other hand, we do want to blast some fellow humans into little tiny bits, let's just pretend to do it instead. Think how much safer it would be if the Yugoslav republics settled their civil war, for example, over a couple of games of Mercs or Operation Wolf? Maybe the UN should suggest it as a solution to all the disputes on planet earth?

Speaking of planet earth, Battle Command isn't set there. Or at least so Ocean claims (it looks an awful lot like the earth though!). In these post-Cold War times it's much more entente cordialey for these things to be set on other worlds, so hurrah for Ocean! It's North v South too, rather than East v West, and you're a tank driver for the North. In fact you seem to be the only member of the North's army as you have to take on the whole of the Southern posse yourself. Strewth.

There are ten different missions in all, nine of which can be selected straight from the missions menu. The tenth, 'Grand Finale', can only be selected once you've completed the other nine in one sitting. In each of the missions you can either proceed straight to your target and do the biz, or hang around shooting baddies for a while first.

You get the option at the start of the game to kit out your tank with up to four weapons. There's a weight limit, but you can comfortably hook up a turret (vital), a missile shooter, and a couple of oddly-shaped, largely useless, lightweight things.

The game is one of them Freescape-style 3D shindigs. You get a rotatable driving seat view of the land around you (complete with indigenous baddies), and basically have to whizz around trying not to crash into too many pyramids. Oh, and shooting nasties. Oh yes. and trying to complete whatever mad. suicidal mission you've chosen to embark upon this time. There's hordes of bad guys just waiting to blast you to bits. If you manage to survive and complete the mish, take a look at the map and whizz off to where some helicopter is supposed to be picking you up. Only nine more to go!

As with all 3D jobbies it looks pretty yawnsome, but it is well done, and the variety of different scenarios adds a lot to it. If you like sims you'll love Battle Command. The graphics are very well done and if you're relaxed enough to be able to get into it, it'll be tanking ahoy round your place. Hurrah!

It moves quite quickly, and the strategic element will keep you going for ages. Is there enough variety, though?

Graphics 87%
Pretty good 'virtual reality' piccies.

Sonics 51%
Crashy sounds when you drive into things.

Grab Factor 79%
Battle Command takes a while to get into...

Staying Power 90%
...but patience and commitment will prevail.

Overall 83%
From a distance, Battle Command looks dull, but move in close. It's a blast.